Reflections on my Freshmen Year



*if you zoom in on this picture, you’ll note that the time is 1:52 a.m. Yes, this is a reflection on my freshmen year. Also, Lug, I say nice things about you in this, so you’d do well to read it.

SO ALL THE KIDS CAME BACK. And then some. I had lunch with Lucy and Aileen today, (well, rather, I watched them eat lunch) and in so doing, encountered about 800 freshmen skipping about.

Hey, welcome to Provo. Glad you could make it.

As I’ve watched them all drift in this week, I can sense their excitement, mixed with apprehension, uncertainty, possibly terror, and maybe shock. But honestly, college is awesome! They’re going to love it. I remember the Christmas before I graduated from high school housed some very traumatic feelings for me. This is my last Christmas as a kid! My life is pretty much ending after this! I’m not ever gonna have any fun! This is it! But in truth, I was just getting off the ski lift! This past year’s run had some intense moguls, a few patches of ice, and a couple of hidden jumps, but it was an awesome ride, and I can’t wait to run it again!

I learned a lot about myself and the outside world. It’s amazing what you can find when you leave Utah. It’s also amazing how misunderstood my poor hometown is. (I may or may not be way too defensive of my beloved motherland that is Provo.) I had some fabulous classes, made a bunch of wonderful friends, realized that Lucy and Aileen are my best friends in the whole world, realized that I have the most wonderful family ever, wrote like a zillion papers, strengthened my left hippocampus… Yeah. It was a great year. Oh, and I live in Hawaii. Just thought I’d mention that. I’m also going on a mission in 16 months.
































16

1. “I’m 16. What’s such a baby about that?” -Leisel, The Sound of Music
2. “I’m 16 years old! I’m not a child anymore!” -Ariel, The Little Mermaid
3.

Black-Eyed Girl

This is a video of the original, just so you can have it in your head.

Hey where did you go,

Back from the Mittons

Down in the Riverbottoms,

Ridin’ a new bike

Laughing and a biking hey, hey

Without a helmet.

In the Emergency Room with

Our hearts a thumpin’ and you

My black eyed girl,

You my black eyed girl.

You were just biking

On Wednesday and so fast

Going down Univsersity

With dozens of cars moving past.

Standing in the intersection laughing,

Impervious to all traffic,

Slipping and sliding [not sloppy though]

Into that curb, it’s you

My black eyed girl,

You my black eyed girl.

Do you remember what your name is?

Sha la la la la la la la la la la te da

So hard to find your way,

When you have no idea who you are.

I saw you just the other day,

My how your face has grown,

Cast your memory back there, Lug

Try to remember who you are

I’m not in Hawaii,

I’m in the hospital with you

My black eyed girl

You my black eyed girl

Do you remember anything about your past?

Sha la la la la la la la la la la te da.

Eternity







Today Aileen taught the lesson in Relief Society, and something crazy happened to me. I was able, for maybe the first time in my life, to begin to accept the idea that my plan for myself (which everyone knows) may just not work out, and the Plan of Happiness, which pertains to eternity, is a lot more important than anything I have scheduled for myself in the next decade or so.

In other words, as she talked about the eternal blessings of a Celestial marriage and family, I realized that, although I’ve thought there’s nothing I’d rather do than go on a mission, and that of course remains my current plan and huge desire, there actually is something even more important than that. (I know that’s hard to fathom.) As Sister Miller told us today, marriage is the pinnacle of the temple, and all the ordinances lead up to it. I like to tell myself that I’m only 19, and I have no maturity whatsoever, and marriage is preposterous, and that’s way down the path, and I’m not even going to date anyone because I still have a mission, and I’m sick of hearing about marriage all the time, it’s actually wonderfully and eternally crucial.

I’m not saying that I’m going to drop the mission and get married immediately or anything like unto that. No. I’ve just begun to allow my pride and close-mindedness fade to a slight degree (and it will continue to fade) as I continue to learn and mature and widen my view beyond 5 years from now. I want to go on a mission to prepare for a family, but I always sort of skip over the marriage part. Now I want to do everything I can to prepare for that too. And if that comes before other plans, so be it. It’s all up to the Lord and His plan for my eternal progression.

First Application Essay

So I guess that link didn’t work. This is the second option, and again, I would appreciate it from the bottom of my heart if you’d read this. The prompt is: Explain your commitment to the teaching profession. Part of your response should address why you want to be a teacher. The other part of your response should address any related experiences you have had that exemplify your desire to teach.

This is my very first draft, so I know there’s a lot that needs to happen. Sentence structure, flow, etc. Let me know what you think if you possibly could. I hope you read the story I posted just before this. So beautiful and inspiring!

I’ve always known that I wanted to be a teacher. Well, that’s not true. I went through my lawyer phase, my paleontologist/ archeologist phase, my graphic designer phase, my author/ editor phase, my Olympian phase, and of course my world- traveling professional gourmet food-tester phase. But as I think back, I realize that being a teacher is the only thing I ever really wanted to do. I remember playing School for hours and hours in my basement with my sisters and other friends, and even on my own with an imaginary class that would pay close attention and do everything I told them to. And now that I’m older, I can see that I’ve been happiest teaching others, and there is nothing I’d rather do.

I want to be a teacher because of the great influence each of mine had on me. The opportunity to pass on the wealth of knowledge and the gifts I’ve been given is one that I wouldn’t ever want to miss, and even one I feel I must take because of all I’ve been taught. I understand that it is in the early years of life that a child develops a sense of identity and perception of life, and I want to help them discover their own potential. My commitment to teaching is a commitment to unlock things rather than create them.

I’m also majoring in music, and that is because of the phenomenal music teachers I’ve had in my life, who helped me unlock the music within me, taught me everything I know about it, and gave me the tools to share these gifts. I’ve had the opportunity to pass them on with my piano students and children’s choirs I’ve helped with. I have a pedagogy emphasis because I have no desire to be a concert performer; I want to teach! The more children I’ve worked with, the more I realize that this is where I love the music the most, and this is where I’m the happiest. It’s so satisfying for me to see the progress each of them can make, and their own satisfaction when they master certain skills or pieces.

Mother Teresa said, “I’m just a little pencil in the hands of a God who is writing a love letter to the world.” I know that teaching is very closely connected to love, and is in many ways simply loving and guiding someone. I am committed to sharing this love that a child may not get anywhere else, and that is why I want to be a teacher.

When I grow up, I want to be a teacher.

My Grandpa Blair tells this story, and it honestly exemplifies why I want to be a teacher. If I were able to make this difference for even one child, my mission as a teacher would be fulfilled.

Mary had grown up knowing that she was different from the other kids, and she hated it. She was born with a cleft palate and had to bear the jokes and stares of cruel children who teased her non-stop about her misshaped lip, crooked nose, and garbled speech.

With all the teasing, Mary grew up hating the fact that she was “different”. She was convinced that no one, outside her family, could ever love her … until she entered Mrs. Leonard’s class. Mrs. Leonard had a warm smile, a round face, and shiny brown hair. While everyone in her class liked her, Mary came to love Mrs. Leonard.

In the 1950s, it was common for teachers to give their children an annual hearing test. However, in Mary’s case, in addition to her cleft palate, she was barely able to hear out of one ear. Determined not to let the other children have another “difference” to point out, she would cheat on the test each year. The “whisper test” was given by having a child walk to the classroom door, turn sideways, close one ear with a finger, and then repeat something which the teacher whispered. Mary turned her bad ear towards her teacher and pretended to cover her good ear. She knew that teachers would often say things like, “The sky is blue,” or “What color are your shoes?”

But not on that day. Surely, God put seven words in Mrs. Leonard’s mouth that changed Mary’s life forever. When the “Whisper test” came, Mary heard the words: “I wish you were my little girl.”

The Other Chosen One

“I think I am right in saying, my dear, that you were born in midwinter?” “No, I was born in July.”


I want to take this time to wish Harry, born at the end of July and not in midwinter, a very happy birthday. Interestingly enough, another boy was also born at the end of July, and that becomes surprisingly significant as time goes on. His name is Neville Longbottom, and his birthday was yesterday.



Pertaining to the significance of the boys’ nearly-shared birthday, and a certain prophecy, Dumbledore says, ” ‘The odd thing is, Harry, that it may not have meant you at all. Sybil’s prophecy could have applied to two wizard boys, born at the end of July that year, both of whom had parents in the Order of the Phoenix, both sets of parents having narrowly escaped Voldemort three times. One, of course was you. The other was Neville Longbottom.”

Neville Longbottom: one of the studliest fictional heros of all time. As Harry discovers in The Order of the Phoenix, Neville may have just as easily been chosen as he, had it not been for the spying and serpentine Severus Snape. (This is a topic for another day.)

“As Harry took off his glasses and climbed into his four-poster, he imagined how it must feel to have parents still living but unable to recognize you. He often got sympathy from strangers for being an orphan, but as he listened to Neville’s snores, he thought that Neville deserved it more than he did.”

Although Neville starts out at Hogwarts as an insecure and less-talented student, he grows into an intelligent and fearless wizard the older and more experienced he becomes, eventually leading Dumbledore’s Army, and courageously and heroically slaughtering a horcrux with the sword of Gryffindor. Yeah. And as he says to Malfoy, “I’m worth 12 of you, Malfoy!” Too true.


Neville, outshone by Harry and most all other students, had the courage and bravery only a true Gryffindor could have, as revealed in The Deathly Hallows. The progression he makes throughout the years is due more to his own hard work and determination than anything else.

“He. . . worked relentlessly on every new jinx and countercurse Harry taught them, his plump face screwed up in concentration, apparently indifferent to injuries or accidents, working harder than anyone else in the room. He was improving so fast it was unnerving and when Harry taught them the Shield Charm, a means of deflecting minor jinxes so that they rebounded upon the attacker, only Hermione mastered the charm faster than Neville”

In comparison to Harry, he shared a birthday at the end of July, as well as parents who had “thrice defied Lord Voldemort”. However, because Voldemort didn’t choose him, he didn’t share the fame, responsibility, or history. What if he had been chosen? I believe that Neville could have withstood Voldemort in the same way that Harry had, because I believe that he had equal courage, bravery, and even love, although it took longer to be realized since it wasn’t forced upon him. I say Neville lives up to the position of the Chosen One in Harry’s absence, and serves just as valiantly in an alternate position. (I don’t mean this to demean or belittle Harry in any way. He absolutely lived up to the destiny Lord Voldemort set for him, and showed immense courage, bravery, and pure love.)


Lord Voldemort: “You show spirit and bravery, and you come of noble stock. You will make a very valuable Death Eater. We need your kind, Neville Longbottom.”
Neville: “I’ll join you when hell freezes over!”