Author: admin

To the Right

On my own, pretending he’s inside me,
all alone I “think” with him ’til morning.
Without him, I don’t even feel a gap in my head.
And when I lose my way, I close my eyes and remember that directions were his dormant job.

In the rain, the pavement shines like silver
and I can’t see it as well because he also couldn’t govern visuals like he was supposed to, so all the lights are misty in the river. Without him, nothing even changes,
and all I see is him in a lab forever and forever.

And I know he’s no longer in my mind,
and I’m talking with the Left and not with him.
And although I know that he’s always been blind,
still I say there was never a way for us.

(No, I don’t love him.)
And when the night is over, he is gone, the gap is just a gap.
Without him, the world around me doesn’t even change because he wasn’t even doing his job before he left.

(No, I don’t love him.)
And everyday I’m learning that all my life, I’ve only been pretending that I can do math or have any sense of direction.
Without me, he is terminated for life,
a world that’s full of other brain parts that I have never known.

I don’t love him,
and I’m not even on my own anymore, becuase I still have the Left.

P.S.
Oh False One, you have deceived me!
It’s too late to apologize.
I can live with or without you.
Gotta get you outa my life!
So long, Farewell, auf Wiedersehen, adieu.
Adios, Muchaco.
I can last the rest of my life without you.
Can’t you see that you don’t belong with me?

P.P.S
Okay fine. God be with you ’til we meet again.

Guaranteed Time Wasters!

Do you find yourself struggling to find ways to spend your time? If you’re looking to waste time, here are some helpful ideas that are guaranteed to leave you saying, “I honestly can’t believe I just wasted part of my life doing that!” In fact, we are so certain that these “activities” will leave you with a less-than-satisfied feeling that if you feel even remotely satisfied, we’ll offer a complete refund for the time you spent reading these time-wasting options. (undefined amount of time, may involve a time machine)

1. Watch the same movie trailers/ youtube videos over and over again
2. Redesign your blog multiple times
3. Read very low-quality, low-substance books
4. Watch very low-quality, low-substance movies
5. Sit on your couch gazing off into space
6. Go on facebook
7. Repeatedly walk into your kitchen, each time opening the fridge, realizing you have no food, then walking out again
8. Play Yahtzee with yourself
9. Simply decide to just stay in your bed for hours at a time
10. Go to despair.com and read all of the demotivators for the 100th time

Of course, I haven’t done any of these things this summer. I just came up this list of what someone really dumb and boring might do if they happened to have some extra time on their hands. After all, if you’re bored, you’re a boring person. (p.s. I hope the hint of sarcasm was evident…)

Hu

I would first like to say that I am so glad to not be starting school today. So glad. At the beginning of this whole Going to College business, I accidentally applied for Summer term. Yes. But then after a long chain of various events, I have wound up defering my enrollment until Fall. Thank Heavens. This is of course partially/ completely due to surgery, but at least right now, surgery seems a

Hu

The first thing that I have to say today is that I am so glad I’m not starting school today. So glad. The first thing that happened was that i accidentally signed up

Adios. Or not.

As I try to contain my excitement at the prospect of leaving my (dear) Timpview High School, I am reminded that there are some things I’m really gonna miss. I am also reminded that there’s some stuff that I’m definitely not gonna miss. So here are just a few things I’m leaving behind.

I’m losing my mind… literally


Okay. In the last year or so, I’ve been having quite a few brain tests. Specifically, 5 days in the hospital last summer, 2 sessions of food and sleep deprivation in preparation for EKGs, MRIs, EEGs, and probably more. So the consensus is that my right hippocampus is scarred. (This is called mesial-temporal sclerosis.) Apparently each time I have a seizure the scarring gets worse. We know this because it shows up all white and bigger than the other hippocampus in the brain scans and stuff. Turns out this white inflammation is scar tissue. In our last epilepsy clinic, which is where we talk to the surgeons and decide if I’m gonna get surgery, they broke it to me that not only is it very scarred, it’s so scarred that it doesn’t even work. So they’re gonna take the entire hippocampus out of my brain. Yes– the very structure in charge of learning and memory. The right one, my non-functional half, is over visual and spacial stuff. Oddly enough, that includes math and that kind of thing… hmmm. correlation? It’s kind of scary to know they’re taking out the whole darn thing, but since it’s so damaged and, as the surgeon called it, sick, I suppose it won’t make any difference. But anyway, I just found it ultra-intriguing to know that half of my brain, the part that remembers stuff no less, is broken. Poor guy. He’s had a long, hard life, going through so much pain and suffering with each seizure, meanwhile trying to work through stats and chemistry and trig and everything else. I take my hat off (or I guess part of my head off) (haha) to this dear friend of mine. We’ve been together for such a long time, it’ll be sad to see him go. But he’s done well. Farewell, dear Right Hippocampus. Until we meet again, Adios.