shazzamber

Author: admin

  • Summer Quotes

    Dell: Jaimie, that’s ESPN!

    Dell: Picking up trash is very economically friendly.

    Lira (my Relief Society president): Let me know if you need anything. I’m just facebook away.

    Amber: Just remember, you’ll always have Haleiwa.

    Amber: Are you afraid of being a dork?
    Adam: I was.
    Brian: Just embrace it.

    Madison: Oh, they changed Night Show times! I have to reevaluate my whole life now.

    Preston: Sour cream is a reminder of how much Heavenly Father loves us.

    Netina: In the Olden Days, when my grandma went to school here…

    Madison (Anthropology major): I hate people. It’s not even a secret. I hate people. [It’s true.]

    Amber: Cassie, how do I make sure this doesn’t happen to me?
    Cassie: Have a baby out of wedlock?
    Amber: No! Have my pintrest info appear on my facebook.

    Madison: I need your ear.

    Amber: Mike, I’m so happy to hear your voice!
    Mike: Me too!

    Dr. K: I was blissfully unaware of the Blackboard issues last night. Ignorance is bliss, and that’s why I’m such a happy person.

    Amber: You said ‘tarantula’ wrong when you were talking to that kid.
    Madison: THAT KID? That kid’ is my life

    Madison: Addison, if you got the Woodstock tie, I would literally throw rotten vegetables at you.

    Devin: We’re just losing pepperonis each time we’re late.

    Netina: My mom, she’s really really old, but she can still read, and she still plays the piano.”

    Madison: I walked into the library and I saw you, and I was like, ‘Whoa. Flirt Sesh.’
    Amber: I do not flirt!
    Madison: You do. Everyone flirts. If you didn’t flirt, I’d disown you for being an alien.

    Some crazy teacher we talked about in an education class: I’m only here to help those students who got 86% of higher. The rest of you need to just sit and fix your problems by yourself. [Holy cow.]

    Brother Winstead: You work with me, or I’ll shoot you in the face with a bazooka.

    Brother Winstead: We [educators] really do well on things badly, and then we perpetuate it.

    Brother Winstead: Moses didn’t say when he brought down the 10 commandments, ‘Thou shalt start with Chapter 1.’

    Brother Winstead: Scare those little suckers to death: ‘What’s she going to do tomorrow?’ and then proceed.

    Heidi: I don’t remember knowing how to count in Kindergarten!
    Brother Winstead: Well, you should’ve failed Kindergarten.

    Brother Sharp: Why is everyone talking? Look at me and pretend like I’m important.

    Brother Sharp: I think this needs to be changed, because I’m a nut job. I disagree with Hugh Nibley. I think he’s overrated.

    Brother Sharp: In my opinion, (I would say humble, but I’m not particularly humble)…

    Dr. D: You start getting used to [hearing music without a downbeat] and then it’s like a drug, and you just say, ‘Oh my gosh, that’s so hip!’

    Thomas: [Identifying a high F] That would be a C.
    Amber: Um, no. Every good boy…
    Thomas: Deserves chocolate! Oh no, deserves fudge.

    Lauren: [talking about new stuff in our house] Every time I take a shower, its like, ‘Woo-hoo!’

    Dr. K: You don’t have to agree with me just because I’m standing up here in the front of the room, with a tie on.

    [After watching a clip from the Bollywood Bride and Prejudice]
    Dr. K: Pride and Prejudice is Austen, right?
    [much laughter from girls]
    Dr. K: Well, I knew it was Bronte or Austen or one of those.”
    Holly: How could you mix those up???
    Dr. K: My stock just went way down with Holly.

    Elder Oaks: Brothers and Sisters, Aloha. People love that you can say that here. Mainlanders even try to imitate you. They’ll stand up and say ‘Good evening” or something meaningless like that.

    Elder Oaks: I’m going to try to call this scripture up on this infernal machine, which I haven’t quite learned how to use yet. The reason I call it an infernal machine is because I”m not very technological. President Packer required us all to get ipads.

    Lug: Leen, you have one inch of hair.
    Amber: Literally.
    Leen: Less.
    Lug: You have one inch of hair, cut in half lengthwise.

    “ Humor is emotional chaos remembered in tranquility. ”
    — James Thurber

  • Favorites

    I really love “favorite” questions, and I get asked them all the time, and I’m never quite sure what to say. So I’ve decided to compile a little list of a few of them, mostly for personal organization.

    Movies:
    Comedy: What’s Up Doc?
    The Scarlet Pimpernel
    Sports: Chariots of Fire
    Mary Poppins
    Pixar: Monsters, Inc.
    The Lord of the Rings: the Return of the King
    Tangled
    Classic Disney: The Lion King
    Chic Flick: Emma

  • Divorce/ Complete Scattering

    My family is splitting up. By order of the First Presidency.

    Well, my biological parents aren’t getting a divorce. (Thank heaven.) But my family in Hawaii– my beloved 11th ward– is being ripped apart and scattered to the 4 corners of the island. The church is structured so beautifully, and of course the concept of wards is divinely inspired, so it’s really lovely the way wards really do function as families.

    And then sometimes other people intervene and make the family change their name, and leave each other. That’s contrary to Heavenly Father’s plan!

    But I know the church leaders are working under the direction of the Lord, so we just have to accept it,  but it’s so hard! Today was the last Sunday in my ward, and it just hurt. We have the best bishopric of all time! And the kids are all really stellar as well. The new ward boundaries are way different, and like I said, they’re changing the name. The BYUH 11th ward is become the Laie YSA 16th ward. Sick.

  • Political Correctness

    I’m doing my homework for my Math Methods for Early Elementary Teachers class, and I come to a chapter about writing story problems. This is what the writer had to say:

    “Naturally, teachers choose interesting problems that do not promote stereotypes. Women do not do all the shopping while men buy gas and cut the grass. Sensitivity to the cultural practices of each family helps teachers make wise choices. A problem about pumpkin pie at Thanksgiving may not relate to the everyday experiences of many children who eat sweet potato pie at the holiday feast or who don’t have holiday dinners.” 161

    Oh boy. Complete craziness.

    The idea of political correctness is especially prevalent at this… holiday… season. Holiday. Who chose which holidays are Holidays? I’m going to be honest– I get really offended when people wish me a happy Halloween*. Although I do celebrate it, there are some people who don’t support that wicked day, and we can’t risk offending them by being friendly. The best policy is to take offense if there’s even a slight possibility that someone somewhere could maybe be mildly offended by something. In fact, let’s just call Halloween a Holiday, and then we don’t have to worry about the consequences of spreading our joy by saying something nice to someone. It is a holiday, after all, and it comes just before Thanksgiving, so it only makes sense that we should strip it of its actual title and just stick it in the pile with the other days of celebration whose names are taboo.**

    I was watching Fox News the other day, which is actually against my principles, but it was just on while I was eating dinner. This came on:

    Wasn’t that great? I love it. I hope you watched the whole video.

    *just kidding
    **that was sarcasm

  • Snacks

    As many of you know, I resolved to change my eating habits this semester, specifically to remember to eat (and actually eat) 3 full meals every day, and choose healthier foods.

    This resolution was actually inspired (and/ or forced upon me) by my mom and Melissa, but I’m really grateful I’ve been doing it, because I’ve noticed a huge change in the way I feel, and with the amount of energy I have.

    This is of course linked to the extra 3 or so hours of sleep I’ve been getting, and with the running I’ve started getting into. The point is, I’ve been healthier this semester, and it started with food.

    These are some of the quick, easy, healthy, low-budget recipes I’ve tried so far:

     Um, just kidding. This is the girl who has ruined Ramen, instant oatmeal, Campbell’s soup, pancakes, and pretty much everything else. Someday I will be able to cook, though. And I am getting better! But the purpose of this post was to recommend easy, healthy snacks that I’ve discovered. So here they are:

    I like to put string cheese on my crackers, and eat them with grapes. I just bought a HUGE bag of string cheese from Costco, so I’m just trying to eat it all before I leave.
     I always eat a protein granola bar right when I get home from my run. They are great.

     Edamame is probably my favorite healthy snack of all time. And all you have to do is throw it in the microwave! You dont even have to worry about puncturing the easy open bag in the right way. So it’s impossible to ruin, which is necessary for me.

    Carrots are so great. Who doesn’t love carrots?

    Let it be known that I’ve greatly improved on my eating habits this semester. I may yet be a gourmet chef someday.

  • I’m on my way

    These past few months have been some of the most productive ones, as milestones go, of my life. I got my driver’s license, started my mission papers, and celebrated 2 seizure-free years since my surgery. NBD.

    Actually no, it is a huge deal. But the big deal right now, besides the continuing anticipation of completing my papers, is that I took the Praxis exam yesterday (the test to get into the School of Education, and to become a teacher), and I passed!!! I thought I failed, because I always think I’ve failed, so when I saw my scores, I literally collapsed of relief.

    So yeah. I just thought I’d announce that I’m one step closer to becoming a teacher, which has been my dream all my life. I must say that I am tempted several times each semester to drop my education major and just graduate with a Fine Arts degree, but I know this is what I’m supposed to do.

    So here I go. I’m off to great places, today is my day, my mountain is waiting, so I’ll get on my way!

    And when I grow up, I will be a teacher. I just have to climb all those mountains of education classes and interviews and student teaching and politics and all that other stuff. But the Praxis is over! Success.

  • Heaven Is Here

    A few months ago, I committed to read a book every month for the rest of my life, because I feel like being as literate and well-read as possible is very important for me. I’m going to try to blog about each book, if they’re good, to further promote literacy, or something. (Still vague there.)

    July’s book was Heaven Is Here, by Stephanie Nielson. I’d like to give a short summary, but I have to go to bed. So, trust me that it’s good, and check it out! I really like her writing, and the whole story is very inspiring.

    Next time I blog about a book, the review will be interesting, and you will most certainly want to jump up and immediately get your hands on the book. Just wait.

  • The Upcoming Election

  • News

    You know those times when you hear something so incredibly surprising that it pretty much dampens the rest of your day? I’ve decided to compile a list of those hard facts that have gradually come to me in my life, for no particular reason other than I like to make lists, and I just found out about one of these (#3), so it’s fresh on my mind.

    1. John Denver and Annie didn’t stay together
    2. The Three Cups of Tea guy was lying
    3. The Born to Run guy ended up with stress fractures
    4. The “Good Parts Version” of The Princess Bride (book) doesn’t actually exist
    5. Pluto lost planet-ship. Still upset about that.
    6. A couple of things about Emma Smith. She’s still an amazing woman.
    7.

  • Oh, you’re here too

    *This post in highly uncharacteristic of me. If you don’t wish to hear me complain just a bit, feel free to overlook this post.

    Do you know what I’m not? I’m not a soloist. I hate performing, because it makes me nervous, and I really can’t stand being in the spot light. I’m happiest working with others, and backing up and